Friday, October 29, 2004

Shall I Compare Thee to an Erectile Dysfunction Pharmaceutical Ad?

The best commercials on the air right now are those promoting Cialis, Viagra and the other erectile dysfunction drugs. The first 20 seconds of the spots describe how, through the miracle of chemistry, floppy-dicked men can regain virility and peace of mind by popping one of these miracle pills. Then, over the backdrop of a man throwing a football through a tire (subtle analogy), a voice-over warns that side effects may include spontaneous combustion, development of voluptuous man boobs and a raging, painful boner that lasts four weeks and can type 120 words a minute.

It occurs to me that each American presidential candidate favorably resembles one of these drugs. They blabber on about how wonderful things would be under their respective administrations – world peace, affordable health care and the public execution of Paris Hilton. And then, just like in the erectile dysfunction commercials, we get to the fine print. Candidate X likes to wear crotchless lace panties and read Harlequin Romance novels. Candidate Y has Irritable Bowel Syndrome and drinks Dewar’s like it’s Aquafina. Candidate Z received an honorable discharge from the Coast Guard because he can't swim and he demanded to wear floaties on his arms while on duty.

Marketing makes the world go ‘round. Nothing is as it seems.

Yes, the E.D. drugs can help your friend “Woody” reappear, but beware: you won’t able to sleep on your stomach for a month.

Yes, you know where George Bush stands, but beware: re-elect him and we may launch a pre-emptive attack on Hawaii during his next term.

Yes, John Kerry might present a “fresh start” for America, but beware: his election might beget a stiff national ketchup tax.

Me? I’m inclined to vote for Kerry because thanks to his stirring convention speech, every time I walk into the bathroom, I look into the mirror, salute myself and say, “I’m Danny Evans and I’m reporting for doodie.”

11 Comments:

At 7:21 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Stop it! Stop IT! My neighbor thinks I'm having seizures from scream-laughing!

Jen

 
At 9:56 PM, Blogger sillygalz said...

I definitely like your site, bookmarked!

I've got a comparison of erectile dysfunction remedies related site. It covers comparison of erectile dysfunction remedies related articles.

Drop by when you can.

 
At 8:06 AM, Blogger ladyrain said...

Great posts about Shall I Compare Thee to an Erectile Dysfunction Pharmaceutical Ad?. Your blog is full of interesting thoughts. Keep up the good work, Daniel Evans.

Cheers,
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At 7:31 PM, Blogger UltimateWeightLoss said...

Your Blog. It's nice . If you ever need penis enlargement surgury related stuff, I'm sure you'd be interested in penis enlargement surgury.

 
At 11:11 PM, Blogger tropical said...

Hi Daniel Evans, I’m just passing by when your site Shall I Compare Thee to an Erectile Dysfunction Pharmaceutical Ad? caught my attention. Great Blog!

I have a pharmaceutical company site/blog. It covers pharmaceutical company related topics. I’m unsure if your site is exactly what I’ve been looking for, but I’m glad I stopped by.

Take a look at my site http://drinkforlife.com if you are able to, you may like what you see!

 
At 5:33 AM, Blogger Island Guy said...

Hey Daniel Evans, you’ve got a pretty good Shall I Compare Thee to an Erectile Dysfunction Pharmaceutical Ad? blog here! I’m going to have to bookmark you!

I have a functional health site/blog. It pretty much covers functional health related topics.

I hope, if you take a quick look, you will find it interesting as well!

 
At 9:28 AM, Blogger tropical said...

Hey Daniel Evans, I’m just passing through, but your site Shall I Compare Thee to an Erectile Dysfunction Pharmaceutical Ad? caught my interest. Nice one!

I’m just searching for sites with keywords like newsletter and have similar focuses as on newsletter.

I’m just on a personal mission to better my health naturally.

Actually, if you get a chance, check out my site http://drinkforlife.com? It would be interesting to see what you think?

 
At 9:38 PM, Blogger tropical said...

Hey Daniel Evans, you have a great blog! Shall I Compare Thee to an Erectile Dysfunction Pharmaceutical Ad? caught my attention so I just had to take a peek.

I have a pharmaceutical dangers related site. I’m especially, searching sites that create an awareness of how the Pharmaceutical Industry is making $BILLIONS$ on our ignorance, but like I said Daniel Evans, your blog Shall I Compare Thee to an Erectile Dysfunction Pharmaceutical Ad? caught my attention.

If you get the time, check out the site above!

 
At 10:09 PM, Blogger Danny said...

A lot of issues have been raised and are still being raised about the advertisements of the ED drugs and cialis is no exception. One fails to understand why the manufacturers make claims and do not follow them and why so much of a hue and cry is being created when the youth already has access to all the so called objectionable content!!!

 
At 11:03 PM, Blogger Mary Connors said...

Abuse of the ED drugs is a much serious and discussed topic. Levitra is often dubbed as the safest of the lot. Unfortunately it has its share of side-effects and very effective ones at that. A few months back, the FDA asked the manufacturers of levitra to make amends to its labels and declare that the drug might adversely affect a person’s eyesight and hearing. http://www.levitrabliss.com/

 
At 2:21 AM, Blogger Chelsey said...

Your blog is full of interesting thoughts. Keep up the good work
Extenze

 

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